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Her dilemma
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She misses him. She doesnt know
what to do. She doesnt know anymore. Its hard, and all she wants is for
everything to be okay. Her stomach heaves, wanting the heartache to end. It feels as
though her heart has been ripped out, and she doesnt know whom to turn to. A part of
her wants him back, but another part wonders. She doesnt want to always wonder
what if. She wants to know for sure. And if she doesnt do it,
shell always wonder. So she pushes him away, and tries not to look back. But her
heart had never looked away. She tries harder and harder to avoid everything. Her heart
cant handle the pain anymore. Shes afraid of losing him forever, but its
too late for that now. Her head was turned by another, and she wishes it werent so.
Because now she wonders
that maybe this isnt it. And she feels sick, as though
she shouldnt doubt something like this. Something wonderful and true. Shes not
god enough for him. He deserves better than what she can offer, all she wants is the best
for him. She thinks that she needs to give him away, so that hell find the one for
him, so that hell see. She wants to know that hes happy. And she doesnt
think that hes happy with her. She doesnt feel that she can give him what she
needs. She said that she didnt think that she loved him. Her heart stopped at that
moment, which told her that she did love him. Her heart stopped dead cold, and froze right
then and there. But she cant keep doing this to him. Because it hurts more and more
each time. She doesnt want to know about any other woman in his life, itd kill
her. All she wants is for everything to disappear, everything but them. Itd be
perfect then. Nothing to worry about, no pain, no one to distract
but then again,
maybe all of this is because she cant accept his love right now. But she worries
that shell realize her mistake and then not be able to repair it. Everything is in
such an upheaval right now, her world is slowly shattering, in slow motion everything
comes apart. |
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